We’ve hit another milestone this week. Officially 32 weeks today a.k.a. 8 months pregnant. I honestly, looking back, felt like I was on an unending journey and that these final weeks/months were going to take an eternity to get to. In some ways, it did feel like forever, and in others I feel like I just was at the doctor’s office for the first time. Getting to now has been insane and so many things I didn’t expect to feel or experience.
On one hand, I feel like a champion because I’m growing this little human in my stomach, who is getting so big and so strong with her punches and kicks, and on the other hand I feel defeated and weak because I’ve never had to limit myself physically to the levels that I had.
Last weekend is when it got super real with just how much I needed to slow down. I had a doctor’s appointment on Friday afternoon and I when they took my blood pressure it came back high. It runs in my family, but I know right now is not the best time to have high blood pressure. My doctor told me, no vigorous activities, and I need to take it easy. Like, he said I couldn’t even walk around much outside because it could be risky. My dear husband was present at this appointment and he sprung into husband mode. He is a big believer in juicing, so he told me we’re going to have turmeric and ginger shots from then on out. I admit I was skeptical, but it’s worked for him so I was on board.
The next two days I just felt defeated. I really lost it on Sunday afternoon when going to church and out to lunch was exhausting and I needed to rest before I could even go to the grocery store. Before we were going to leave I started to cry because every little thing had become difficult for me. Putting clothes on, standing for too long, bending over, trying to reach things on a shelf, even washing the dishes…I’ve already got short arms so having a belly that doesn’t let me get all the way to what I need to reach makes it even harder. I started weeping and I told Anthony that I felt horrible because I feel like I have to be iron woman and tell everyone how “wonderful and fabulous” I feel while being pregnant.
The truth is I don’t feel wonderful and I feel far from fabulous. If you were my parents you would of gotten a much more real/raw response to this topic…I’m keeping it PG here 🙂 Have there been things I’ve enjoyed about being pregnant? 100% absolutely yes. I live for the routine times that I know she’s awake & kicking me, when Anthony gets to feel her move, having my little girlfriend along with me everywhere I go, someone to talk to that just listens and knowing that she’s half of me and half of Anthony. What’s been difficult? Waking up in the morning and trying to get out of bed only to have pelvic pain, my maternity clothes being small already, being kicked so hard in the bladder, stretch marks (literally everywhere), sore legs, sore feet, and just not feeling like myself because I’m sharing a space that I was used to just being mine with someone else…which brings me back to the wonderful part. I’m sharing myself with this little lady in a way I can’t share with anybody else. Cue my tears, I am thankful and I am elated that I am going to be a mom soon and I promise I won’t take it for granted.
I’m looking forward to the next 4 weeks before I begin my maternity leave and I can really prepare for her arrival. I’m nervous because, hello, I’m going to be responsible for a new little life. Overjoyed because I’ve always wanted this and so has Anthony. So while this has been challenging, I know the challenge is just beginning here.
I will also add…I had to visit my doctor again yesterday and good news to report. Blood pressure is back to normal (Thank you Husband) and Kennedy had a growth spurt from one week ago…2 CM belly growth for me! She’s growing and she’s strong. Just gotta stay put a few more weeks little lady! Here’s a bumpdate photo for you: